Humour or humor in English language

It's a well known fact that humor prolongs life. Well... at least Russian humor does it for Russians and English - for the English. Read it and enjoy the secret of English longevity. If you don't even smile while reading, it means that either you don't understand English or you are not an Englishmen.

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A wealthy businessman was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner. The businessman took out his wallet, extracted two dollars and asked, "If I gave you this money, would you buy some Budweiser with it instead?"

"No, of course not. I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.

"Would you use it to gamble with instead of buying food?"

"No, I never gamble" the homeless man said. "I need everything I can get just to stay alive."

"Would you spend the money on greens fees at a golf course instead of food?"

"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't played golf in 20 years!"

"Well," continued the businessman, "I've decided not to give you the two dollars after all. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."

The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm pretty dirty, and I probably smell bad too."

"Don't worry about that," replied the businessman. I just want her to see what a man looks like who's given up Budweiser, gambling and golf."

(To see another anecdote or joke, just visit this page again or click the image below.) The number of pages containing English humor - 442 for this day.